Many people would admit that lasting love is not achieved by flowers, diamonds or having a house.
Yet, men and women commit the same mistakes of trying to keep a relationship lasting by...yes, putting their attention on flowers, diamonds or any materialistic items such as money!
Love is achieved by constantly teasing and flirting with each other and creating the loving romantic feeling.
When a wife comes home, the act of a husband walking up to his wife to give her a hug would show his sweetness much better than if he would buy her anything she wants and yet never really talks to her.
Similarly, when a husband comes home, if a wife stands up and welcome her husband. This will make the husband very happy! Yes, he will feel much happier than the wife being simply “too busy” to even greet the husband.
But if the husband comes home and the wife has a stiff face and she says in a rough voice, “So you are back! Hungry??” The husband will forget that he is hungry and when he looks at his wife’s face, he will think, “This looks dangerous. I better go somewhere else!”
So in the world of love, it is very important to learn how to make another person comfortable and at the same time, be comfortable yourself. This is an art which I teach at my Love Seminar.
We have seen many husbands afraid of wives -- typical henpecked husbands.
Poor guys. They work hard, make money, they are competent and handsome. But they are very much afraid of their wives. They say, “My wife won’t allow me.” “I can’t. My wife will get mad.”
Of course, there are different types of fear. If the fear creates so much pressure and so much discomfort, there will be marital problems that get worse.
The lesson to take away is, are you aware of how comfortable you make another person feel, or are you so insensitive that your loved ones are simply tolerating you or too afraid of you? What kinds of feelings do you create for another when you are with someone?
Some people assume that because they have gotten along well with their co-workers and clients in their professional field, they would have no problem with their spouses and family members.
Many managers, execs, CEOs who have attended my Love Seminar, and with surprise discovered their lack of handling skills in areas of communication whenever love matters are concerned.
Love is an ABILITY. Love is not achieved by luck or your money.
I will be holding my 18th Love Seminar in Los Angeles. Looking forward to see all of you in LA.
Hellen Chen
Relationship Consultant
