Posts by MmCntrY

“Date after marriage, not before.”

Posted by on Jul 11, 2017 in Articles, Blog, Events | 0 comments

“Date after marriage, not before.”

  I emphasize “date after marriage, not before.” When one is just dating with someone, the issues faced will never be the major issues faced by a married couple.   The most important point of marriage is to find a person first, then you can create love together with that person — for the rest of your life.   Before you build a house, you need a piece of land. How the land looks is not important. The most important point is to find the land first before you can build a house.   If you first fantasize on how your house should look, how the decor should be, it is not practical thinking. You don’t even have land! Once you have land, you can build it any way you want – how fancy the design is, how elegant the decor is – all up to you! If you have land, you are not worried about having an ugly house. You will build it the way you like it. If the house is ugly, then it is your own doing!   This is what I mean by the principle of “staking out your land.”   As to how to fight for this land, how to win it, what kinds of ways to get it, how to get the contract… this is the time to flaunt your talents!   If you cannot get the contract, who would know how talented you really are?   Isn’t the sequence to get the contract first, then work on the “how-to” in executing the project? Many people have lots of good ideas about a project, but they cannot even come near to getting a client’s contract.   There is an old Chinese saying: first form a family, establish your career after. The modern individuals often do it the opposite way.   They think they must have financial stability before marriage – they have been taught incorrectly on this point. Does that mean a person who has financial stability will never get divorced? Does that mean a person who doesn’t have financial stability could never get married? All these are not correct.   The principle is simple. If one person can survive on their own, then two persons will not be a problem!   After marriage, one will increase one’s responsibility level, especially after giving birth to kids. One has more willingness to produce. You have your own place to take care of. You may need the income of you and your spouse to make it. But that is taking responsibility in life and it is more interesting and a lot more constructive.   Marriage has nothing to do with smartness. It is a matter of willingness.   The decision to get married will make you improve. After marriage, you are forced to move forward in life, and having children will force you to move forward as well. For survival sake, you have no choice but to become competent and able.   Marriage is all about staking out a path. This path is a very long journey traveled by 2 persons.   Don’t think critically about your spouse and how he or she is not a match –even the most matched couples will fight. Do not mind how the man may be somewhat dull in some areas or the woman is not the ideal person one is looking for.   So don’t criticize another person. Think about 10, 20 years later, does that person have the potential to travel on this road with you? That is the main point you should look at.   When I look at a person, I never look at his appearance or what his salary is. I look at his potential. Is his goal the same as mine: willing to improve and grow?   You have to ask yourself what kind of life you would like to live 10, 20 years from now? And thus nourish the relationship with your partner to get to where you wish to go!   If you want to know how to find the right...

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How To Play A Woman’s Role Well?

Posted by on Jul 5, 2017 in Blog, Events | 0 comments

How To Play A Woman’s Role Well?

I have talked about the role of man and woman in a relationship and how to fulfill their roles. In this article, I will highlight the woman’s role.   For last 10 years, I have conducted a Bride Training Class to specifically teach women how to assume the role of a woman well and how to manage their relationships as wives. (Similarly, if you are a man, you can take part in the Groom Training Class.)   Some of what I teach starts with core principles.   For instance, how to be attractive. You would be surprised how many women were not even familiar and at ease with their body. They did not know how to apply makeup and did not know how to dress up to make themselves attractive.   To be a woman is actually not easy. This is the reason why problems occur continuously between the two sexes: women frequently have a hard time to play their role well.   The women of today are very strong, competent and have a high level of education. Their ability to fight back is often ten times stronger than men. They speak fast, think fast, react fast, and act fast.   They are also highly sensitive.   However, in a relationship, these qualities will drive a man crazy. This is another reason why love can suffer.   I am not here to tell women that they must suppress themselves and hold back.   Understand the purpose of having a relationship: when men and women are together, there is no reason for either one to try to show who is better than the other.   In a relationship, men are not doing business transactions with women. Man and woman are not together because of needing to sign business contracts where one side may want the upper hand.   When women are at work, they certainly can be strong and able, just like a “superwoman.”   But one has to know how to change your role between work and love.   ( I teach this extensively at my Love Seminar) And don’t misunderstand this point. Women do not need to behave like a weak and helpless person at home either. And women do not have to show off anything or try to impress someone – they can just simply be adorable and be themselves!   If you do these well as a woman, you will literally charm everyone around you!   My book “Hellen Chen’s Love Seminar” covers how to play the role of man and woman to make a relationship working.   Hellen Chen Bestselling Author Hellen Chen’s Love Seminar...

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What matters the most in your life?

Posted by on May 4, 2017 in Articles, Events | 0 comments

What matters the most in your life?

At the end of life, what could you look back and really know you have not lived in vain? One thing that matters the most to me is love. I believe in love and I believe that all of us can create and live the most beautiful love story we can ever imagine! See you at my next love seminar event: Los Angeles Event: http://smarturl.it/hc-la-seminar Taiwan...

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How Do You Really Understand Someone?

Posted by on May 4, 2017 in Articles, Events | 0 comments

How Do You Really Understand Someone?

My side passion has always been to meddle in other people’s relationship issues. And over the years, in addition to being a business and management consultant, I have even earned the title of “Matchmaker of the Century.” This title was given to me by the couples I have match-made. It is not because I have match-made thousands of people. It is because the people whom I have match-made usually have hard-to-resolve issues which make them not wanting marriage. My longest record has been working with a lady for 8 years, to finally get her to say “I do.” Many people have told me the reason why they could not get married is because they have not found someone they like. What I have seen is people wasting lots of time in dating. They wanted to “make sure” someone is the right one. They hanged on to futile relationships or they break up with the person whom they should have married. Here is another issue: if you have met someone you like, how do you go about understanding that person? Do you go out with him to watch a movie? Have dinner? Kiss? Observe how he dresses? Ask about his background? The truth is: you cannot fully understand a person this way! It is not that you are not smart enough. It is the fact that even he himself does not know himself. You ask him 10 questions about life. He says, “I don’t know” or even if he gives an answer, it is not completely how he feels. Can you see the problem? He is not even sure why he gives those answers! If you really want to know a person completely, you need to use a whole lifetime and at least be with him/her! And people change. Your favorite color, food, music and hobbies all can change. So if you think you “understand” someone, I guess this could only happen if he/she never changes. For some of you, your parents or siblings have not understood you despite spending so much time together. Thus, to find a partner who can truly understand you is almost an impossible task! You spend 2 years dating this person – how well do both of you know each other? So why waste the 2 years? Why not just get married first and then try to understand each other? At least this is your better half, you will start to manage your marriage life, have kids, etc. This kind of life is real. When you are just a boyfriend and a girlfriend, what you understand and know about each other is not real – both sides are always withholding certain things. How she dresses for you at the date may not be how she dresses usually. After marriage, she may not dress this way or speak to you in the same manner. And the love sparks between you and her are just like acting in a play. No matter how much you have given for this relationship, it is like trying to fill up a bucket with water, but the bucket is filled with holes. You assume that spending more time together will help you understand each other more. I have to tell you this truth: over time, one simply has better skills to not reveal certain things and matters that get covered up between both of you will become more and more! A lady came and met me for the first time. She told me she was with her boyfriend for 8 years. And the second time she met with me again, I told her, “You can separate from your boyfriend. This year we will find someone for you and you can get married.” Tears streamed down her eyes. After one week, she separated from her boyfriend. Now she is happily married, expecting a child, and happier than ever before! This lady later asked me, “How did you know I should separate with my boyfriend?” I understood what happened. She spent 8 years with her ex-boyfriend, but there was no end to it....

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Hellen Chen’s LOVE-U-Forever Relationship Love Seminar

Posted by on Feb 8, 2017 in Articles, Events | 0 comments

Hellen Chen’s LOVE-U-Forever Relationship Love Seminar

  In January, I hosted my fifteenth Love Seminar in Los Angeles, USA. I am so humbled to have met such an amazing group of work professionals and couples. They all came from different backgrounds but they have one thing in common: they all shared similar values when it comes to love and personal improvement. Here are some incredible feedback from my students:   I thought my problem had been my shyness with women. At this event, I found out even if I had met a “perfect” match, I would have a hard time to keep this relationship going. This event woke me up. Thanks for the very powerful info on not only how to approach women but also to make relationships last.  — Ken   I loved the “practice session” in your event. I have been married for close to 10 years. There has been no major problems going on with my husband but here is where the problem lies, our relationship has no sparks or passion. You showed me what was missing — I see it all started with my communication. I don’t have to avoid saying certain things out of fear of upsetting my spouse. And I don’t have to “try so hard” to be nice. By the way, I wish to say your love seminar is the only event I have come across (I have attended other events) that truly let attendees practice how to interact with people the correct way. Please keep me informed on your future events.  — June   How I wished I had come across your seminar and materials 10 years ago!! I was the typical “busy working professional” who despite wanting to get married, kept on missing the boat. Some people envy me for my professional success and the money I make, but they never know my failures in relationships. You are the first person I met who truly helped me answer these questions: how do I find the right person and how do I know who is suitable for me? Thanks for such a clear direction!  — Angeline   I am 51 this year and was divorced for many years. I went in and out of dating men and became very frustrated on why I could not find the right person. I started to wonder “what’s wrong with me?” You showed me what really mattered to keep a relationship going. Thank you!  — Josephine   My wife and I had a very serious fight recently and she was contemplating divorce. Your workshop sheds light for me what exactly deteriorated this relationship. It was not what I thought on how we had grown apart. You showed me how both of us could fully do what we love to do in life without “compromising” for each other. We could have different interests, different friends, etc and still find a solid common ground. Your event gave me tremendous hope. I now know how to be a better man for my wife!  — Jack   I love what you taught at the event. I thought I had missed the time for finding a husband after raising 2 boys myself. I felt awkward dating and felt totally at a loss when a new date wanted to be intimate. You make having a lasting relationship SIMPLE again for me. I know now how to find my ideal mate.  — Madeline   My workshop seminars have helped men and women from all around the world on how to experience their own “happily ever after.” I developed special relationships with my students throughout the years and I have witnessed the enormous growth in both their personal and professional lives.   In case you have missed my last event, I am excited to be hosting my next Love Seminar workshop in Los Angeles on May 20, 2017. The topics I discuss in my workshops are unique and different to one another. I am always learning new skills and sharing what I have learned on what it takes to nurture and maintain meaningful relationships.   Join us for our...

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